Writing and Holidays and Tears and Goodbyes

Whew! It feels like it has been ages since I last updated this blog. I try to be a good little blogger, but I'm just terrible at it (as is evidenced by my posting history...).

It's been an eventful few months. I got to spend Thanksgiving with my dad's side of the family, and we threw a surprise Sound of Music themed 90th birthday party for my grandma, which was a huge success and I'm sure I'll be hearing teary-eyed reminiscences about it for years to come. I spent November and December working on my first round of revisions on the book, and then sent it to my editor for a first round light edit over the holidays. Christmas found us spending time with my mom her side of the family. It was beautiful, laid back, and relaxing. I played Yahtzee and card games with my Grandma Norma (mom's mom) and got to hang out with my sister and her family who just moved back to the states from Peru.

I'm so thankful for that time at Christmas, because on January 10th, my Grandma Norma passed away.

Grandma Norma and me at my baby shower in 2009.

The last 2.5 weeks have been full of nerves and tension and tears. We scrambled to get out to my mom's house in time to see Grammy one last time, but we just missed that opportunity by a small window of less than an hour. It will probably grieve me for a long time to come that I didn't get to say one last goodbye, one last I Love You. But I know I can't dwell in the past. So I will try to breathe and continue to be present as I live out my own life. She would have wanted that.

We ended up in New Jersey for the funeral, and while it was difficult (financially and emotionally), I got to see extended family I hand't seen in years. Under the circumstances, I realized that I want to make every effort possible to visit with them as much as I can. Saying goodbye to a loved one is hard, but so much harder when you haven't talked to them recently.

The funeral was beautiful, and my husband and I were humbled by the opportunity to sing Grandma's favorite song, "How Great Thou Art," during the service. Somehow, miraculously, we made it through the song without falling into tears.

In the midst of this flurry of activity and grief and introspection, I am trying my best to get my book into shape. (It's my book's New Year's resolution.) Currently, I'm working on cover design, and I plan to commission a map for the book in the coming weeks.

Due to the very eventful past few months, and the fact that I am grieving (and prone to depression and anxiety), I'm trying to give myself some space to breathe. I need to make sure that I remain healthy through this process of self-publishing. And because of that, I've decided to push my release date back a few months. I want to make sure every detail is taken care of and every loose end is tied up before sending this baby out into the world. I want it to be perfect for you, the reader. I want it to pull at your heart in all the right ways. And so, I'm now looking at the Summer Solstice--June 21st--as the new release date for the book.

And from now on I will try to be a better blogger. :)